Roller Coaster Ride

To borrow from a fellow blogger, this week (or last few weeks) have been a roller coaster ride of emotions and circumstances for us. We sold our condo and bought a house (at least the preliminary process of all of that), I went to a conference, visited some long-time friends and received a call in the car on the way back that would change our lives (at least for the next few days..) We have been active with our attorney for only about a month and a half. They don't even have all of our paperwork from our SW yet...but they called us this week with a potential situation and wanted to know if we wanted our profile shown to this birthmother.

The first thought is YES! Then more details follow, jail, drug use, multiple children already placed elsewhere, etc, etc.... Then I just think about the baby, the innocent baby, the one who needs a good home, a stable home, a home with parents that can love her or him unconditionally. We felt led to say yes to this situation for a variety of reasons but mostly because we did talk and pray about it. We prayed for the birthmom who has had a difficult life and has made some bad decisions, we prayed for her pregnancy (and still do) that no matter what the outcome with us, that this baby will be healthy and safe and find a safe, loving home. We prayed for the baby, that the drugs have not done any damage or very little. We prayed for the rest of her family. In the end this situation did not work out. It has been a tumultuous three days resulting in an outcome that although was not wanted by us, is probably best for our family in the long run. In Steven Curtis Chapman's song, "I Will Trust You" He sings:

God, I trust You

I will trust You
I know Your heart is good
I know Your love is strong
And I know Your plans for me
Are much better than my own

This song was written in response to the tragic death of one of his adopted daughters. I admire his strength, his will to go on in the face of such a tragedy. It is because of his faith that he is able to do this. And because we serve such a loving God who is ALWAYS there for us, even when we turn away, I can trust that His plan is much better than my own.