A lot has happened since I first started this blog, I had intended to post more but I think I was scared. Scared that someone may read it that shouldn't...scared just to put the thoughts out there. The thoughts, the frustrations, the anger, the hopes, fears, dreams...there are so many things going on in my mind and heart that it is hard just to describe one of them.
So, we completed our home study in July and we received the "official" letter September 23rd, that was dated September 22nd (Walter's birthday-that's a great gift!) stating that our home study had been approved and that we would be considered for any placements that fit ours and the birthmother's descriptions.
Now comes more waiting, passing time and praying....lots of praying. Praying that we can be the kind of parents we need to be to this special child, praying that we can hold on to hope and wait until it is the right time for us, praying for the birthmother that she is healthy and that she can make this most difficult decision. All of this is in God's hands now. It is not up to us to decide what child we are placed with anymore than it is for us to decide what kind of biological baby we would create together if we were able.
We went to a picnic recently and met a lot of other families who have been through what we are going through or are going through it now. It was comforting to hear their stories and to see their children in various stages of life. More than one person told us, this will be you next year or soon. Or they would say, "when it is right, it will happen for you." Sounds kinda like a cliche to me, but I do take comfort in those words.
So, here's to living life as we live it now and looking forward to living life with a child in our family.
